Fashion show

So today around 7pm I was invited to go to a private clothing sale of some store called J2 by my brother's girlfriend. Dope shite right? NO, well at first it wasn't. We had to wait outside the mall waiting for them to get ready because unbeknownced to us there was going to be a fashion show. Wow trendy clothed people everywhere, I'm talking kinda HK trendy. I've never seen so many converse shoes worn with Arab scarfs. And by the way IMO Arab scarfs are Done.

The show opens with some amature dance crew (clearly didn't get paid) that look like they are still in high school. The attitude of the dancers are varied from "so smug you wanna smack'em cause they aren't that good" to "what am I doing here". Their execution of the moves are lackluster but still enjoyable in a "omg did the worse dancer just get a solo?" kinda way. After what seems like 15 minutes of limb wriggling they send out the first model. And the models are not that much better than the dancers. One male model is walking so slow it's like he just got out of bed. Another male model laughably leads with his shoulders every step. A female model decides that the best way to show off her outfit is to canter like a horse down the catwalk, arms straight down, and chin up. And the another female model decides that no she doesn't need to pull her shoulders back, they are fine just where they are in front of her chin.

Some bitchy things I say during the show:
"DOWAH! No she didn't just do a mid runway pageant turn and pose!!!"
"Bitach, just pull back your shoulders!"
"Why even turn up if your gonna sell it like that?"
"Whoa there horsey!"

The clothes they send out are.... trendy. They are okay if you like that style. They did send out a long coat that I would describe as "homeless chic" in that it was too big and had over sized saggy pockets, it wouldn't be out of place if you were Mila Jolavic in resident evil and needed to kill some zombies. And they also sent out a Metallic grey suit, *yawn* no more metallics, they are also Done. They tried to dress down a dress shirt and bowtie with a baby blue hoody and black windowpane on white shorts and suspenders. Needless to say they missed the mark.

Finally entering the first store I find nothing I like. It's all very japanese/HK style clothes with bright colours and bold cutsey graphics and busy designs. This store does not design it's own stuff it just carries the overprice products of other labels. In the second store I see a white fedora, I put it on a scoff and instantly like the clear plastic top hat shaped stand it was placed on, I try it on and love it and then get my brother to wear one also. Clearly we were the ones having the best time in the store. In the final store I do find a jacket by Obey there for $120. It's medium grey, double-brested with metal buttons, and has a large rounded collar ( imagine if you layed it out flat it would look like a semi circle). I didn't buy it deciding that I already have a lot of jackets and that I'd rather save my money and buy a really kick ass Burberry Trench like this one. But what was more disturbing than the $70 t-shirts that they sell there was that there was blood on the floor, I mention this to a sales person there and this is our exchange.

Me: "Did you know there there is some blood on the floor?"
Her: " Yeah I know it's disgusting." then she walks away. Classy right?



So we've spent about 3 hours there and the only things we take home with us are some fun memories. Naturally I strut out of the mall combining what I learned that day, leading each step with my shoulder and lifting up my leg like a horse. Then I realize the the models are walking in front of us and are leaving the same way. Pure Gold!